On my list
right now is tackling “All Things Holiday”. Buying presents. Decorating the
apartment. Ordering holiday cards.
Finding the
right recipe for egg nog that doesn’t taste like egg nog.
%uFFFDSo, yeah, we
are full-throttle in holiday mode. For those of us that do both Hanukkah and
Christmas, it is a daunting, constant task of presents, candle lighting, flying
reindeer sightings. And my favorite: the plethora of Claymation specials. As we
all know, this year,
Hanukkah came early. Waaaay early. Started on December 1 (if we think this is
bad, just wait til 2013. We’ll be lighting the menorah and carving the
Thanksgiving turkey…darn Gregorian calendar). It is the first time
in our kiddo’s life Hanukkah and Christmas have not overlapped any
days. —
%uFFFDBut, no matter where they may (or
may not be) by the calendar, in a kid’s eyes, Christmas and Hanukkah, though
similar with presents and miracles, are, very definitely, two different things.
I
love Meredith Lopez’s take on it in this month’s “On Second Thought” essay (have
you read it? If not, click here). In her witty open letter to Santa,
she writes, “…no mistaking it: Hanukkah was the holiday for sensible, practical,
small gifts; and Christmas was for breathlessly-ripping-the-paper-off, squealing
with delight, “Santa got my letter!” gifts.”
In our
household, we’ve tried to level the holiday playing field, so to speak.
Filled with
the festive spirit, I recall what happened below in a treat for all, yes, you
betcha, Virginia, there is a holiday poem! Enjoy!
‘Twas weeks
before Christmas, we were in the abode
An Interfaith
mom, I fretted in uberstressed mode.
The little elf
was there, to be placed on some shelf.
Jason
muttered, “For this price, he should move by himself.”
Tessa was
tucked, all snuggled and snorin’
She knew the
elf was comin’, yes, on the next mornin’.
When I, with
my last green stocking hung up,
Heard Jason
say, “So much stuff! That’s enough!”
“You have the
elf, Santa, eight reindeer to boot!
I really don’t
know how — this point may be moot –
A Jewish dad
can compete without very much
But a lone
dreidel! A lit menorah she can’t touch!
I stopped and
thought. Of course, he was right.
But what could
I do at this late time of night?
When what to
my wondering brain should appear
But a wacky
idea. Well, yeah, it was weird.
With a good
Sharpee in hand, all ready to go,
I gulped down
some wine (I think maybe Merlot).
I grabbed the
stuffed dreidel and drew a nice face,
A new
tradition created, one with its own place.
Two eyes. Big
smile. A nose. Oh, what fun!
No ears. No
teeth. Okay, now it’s all done!
Not for the
couch! Not the bookcase or wall!
Now go to bed,
go to bed, go to bed all!
As we lay
there, dreaming, all was dark in the sky,
At 5:43, Tessa
opened an eye.
“Mama, Daddy,
come see! Do you see?
I’ve got two
new friends and they’re waiting for me!”
And then,
without java, I heard myself say,
“Yes honey,
they traveled a very long way,
Here’s The Elf
on the Shelf, his name is Murray,
He’s cheery
and nice — his collar quite furry.
“And who’s
that?” she pointed. I said, “You’re so lucky!
He arrived
late last night and his name is, um, Bucky!”
“What
is it?” she asked (as Jason waited for my fable).
I exclaimed,
“Why! It’s The Dreidel on the Table!!”
Her eyes – oh,
they twinkled at each new-found friend,
And played
with them, laughing for hours on end!
They battled
big dinos, scared away ghosts,
They served us
breakfast: (plastic) fruit, tea and toast!
When all of a
sudden, Tessa stopped all the play
And asked me,
“Who comes for the next holiday?”
We were
silently stunned, unsure what to do,
About this
holiday hell I got us into.
Easter hare in
the chair would be quite a sight.
Passover
armadillo? On the pillow? Not alright.
Kangaroo in
the loo? For Yom Kippur? Ban the thought!
Oh, what do we
tell our wee little tot?
I spoke a few
words, telling the truth, no lies here,
“Many holidays
are special, and many are dear,
With presents
and latkes, sales and ol’ Claus,
We need extra
help now to remember to pause.”
“No matter
what we believe, no matter where on the map,”
As I went on
to explain, Tessa climbed in my lap.
“Bucky and
Murray make sure we stop and be kind,
And say Happy
Holidays to all! Joy and Cheer may you find!”
Okay, I
admit, that last part is a little corny. FYI, Tessa loves Bucky. Murray? Not so
much. Murray is a little stiff. Murray also doesn’t sit very well on any sort of
shelf without being propped up.
Maybe
Murray found that recipe for egg nog…
For more
of my holiday mishaps, check out my essay on our traditional holiday bad luck as part of New York Family’s 12 Days of Christmas countdown!
