Dream: I am learning about holidays in school. Someone uses the phrase cheer. I clap my hands and say holiday. That is a holiday cheer, no?
Reality: Holiday cheer is a really cool thing. It makes adults act like happy kids again! By day, everywhere you walk down the sidewalk there are big green trees, these green leafy circles called wreaths, and loud funny music playing. There’s also lots of glittery store windows filled with beautiful decorations. At night the city lights up even more than usual. I didn’t know that was possible. It completely blew my mind! Even the trees are lit up. There are oh so many new wonders to take in that I get slightly overstimulated. But there is something special about it that makes me so happy. And I noticed that the grown up people around me seem happier too. Is it a universal happy feeling? Maybe that’s why Mommy put the sign on our door that says “It’s the most wonderful time of the year!”
During this wonderful time, there are lots of special celebrations. Each night of this thing called Hanukkah we get to play with fire. First Uncle Adam sings this silly song he called a blessing and then he lights this funky candlestick called the menorah. And the lighting and singing goes on for eight whole nights. We light more and more fire on it until it is blazing! Plus, you get to eat all this fried food and there are no vegetables. I am digging this. We also spin a toy called the dreidel, which started me gambling at a young age. I only won chocolate coins called gelt but you have to start somewhere.
Then for this Christmas thing I keep hearing about we brought a tree inside our apartment. I am usually not allowed to bring in rocks or leaves but Mommy let Daddy bring in a tree? That goes against everything I have learned to date on so many levels but no one seemed to question it so why should I? The next day Mommy and Daddy decorated this indoor tree with all sorts of toys called ornaments and then told me not to play with it. What’s up with that? Good luck. Last I checked we do not live in a museum so I keep taking the toys off one by one to play with them and the tree still looks just fine to me. Daddy also hung up these funny looking socks called stockings. I tried them on but was told to look and not touch. They are a word called holiday decoration. Go figure! Usually Mommy has to beg me to wear my socks.
And we started going to so many more parties. I learned that I love to dress up and party! I had the most amazing new food at holiday parties. I had candy canes, and gelt, and drank this most amazing milk shake called egg nog. I got to decorate ornaments with jewels and make gingerbread houses and get all messy making things with glitter. It’s a dream come true!
Then Mommy and Daddy dressed me all up and I thought I was going to another party but it was just to meet this really old guy in a horribly outdated red jumpsuit to take a picture with him. They call him Santa. I don’t see the big deal here. I was forced in his lap and told to smile. Ha! I don’t think so. I was a good spirit and did not cry. Then Santa told me I am on his nice list. But did that surprise anyone?
The most fun pictures were the photos we took for what is called a holiday card picture. You get to dress up and dress up your doggie and decorate your toy house and toys. They all looked fab! Then Mommy said to “Vogue” for the camera so I moved around nonstop chasing puppy and would then have to freeze for the camera. Mommy kept rewarding me and puppy for holding still for a millisecond. Puppy and I got so many treats. And Mommy got her photo. Daddy said she got what she deserved. So I guess we did really well. I think we topped the annual Kardashian family card this year. I am jumping up and down in my crib for joy just thinking about it!
