This past weekend presented the rarest of opportunities: With my wife at a spa getaway with two of her best friends, and my daughter on a trip to Washington as part of a Jewish youth group learning about the legislative process, my 10-year-old son and I were left to set our destinies—and all I really wanted to do on Saturday was relax, and relax on my terms, even if it meant some low-level father-son barter.
Curious what the chorus would say, I posted my desire on Facebook: “I’m seriously thinking about proposing to Adam: how about I lay down and sleep and read and sleep and read all day, and you play video games all day.”
To my surprise, I received overwhelming and immediate affirmation from moms, dads, and non-parents alike, the gist of it being that I should go for it without hesitation. What I loved about the response was that, clearly, we all can relate to the desire to do nothing except indulge in a quiet sedentary pleasure. At the same time, I suspect there was also a lot of support for letting Adam have the same opportunity—to let him break free of the hard cocoon of an organized day without being targeted with parental guilt or anxiety about too much digital time.
So that was the set-up, and I agreed to it even after a friend of his came over to join in the video game orgy. But then there was another plot twist: After an hour of digital decimation, Adam wanted to introduce his friend to the board game–Ticket To Ride –which has recently turned into a really big hit in our family—and he wanted me to join them. Look it up if you’re not familiar: It’s a great mix of strategy and drama.
I thought about not joining them, of not getting off the couch, of not breaking up my leisurely communion with the Saturday Times. But I found myself feeling that I really wanted to play. If it were a different scenario, in which I had to make a case for why Adam should try a board game instead of video game, and I had to insist on him trying it despite his protestations, I would have kept my mouth closed and stayed on the couch. But I like Ticket To Ride, and actually being asked to play by my son? That’s was victory itself, even if Adam and I went on to lose to his friend, Jack, who had never played the game before. I hate that.
Eric Messinger is the editor of New York Family, and he can be reached at [email protected].
