The State of the Kid: 2015 Survey Results

Highlights, the company that puts out magazines for kids, just released its annual “State of the Kid” report for 2015, focusing on three main areas: discipline, indulgence, and competition. With the help of C+R Research, a leading market research firm with expertise in youth and families, Highlights interviewed a kids’ panel between April and May of 2015. A total of 1,754 surveys were completed by boys and girls ages six to twelve (49 percent were boys and 51 percent were girls).

So, what did they find? Here’s a summary:

Discipline

While three-in-five kids described their parents as easygoing, that starts to change as they get older and start to exert more independence. So it’s no surprise that 57 percent of kids ages 11 to 12 label their parents as easygoing, down from 62 percent of 6- to 8-year-olds and 60 percent of 9- to- 10-year-old respondents.

Most kids—77 percent of all who responded— agreed that discipline does improve their behavior because it helps them learn right from wrong. And although time-out is the most popular technique used by parents, it’s not necessarily the best one. “Discipline is about teaching— not about punishment—and finding ways to teach children appropriate behavior is essential for healthy development,” said Daniel J. Siegel, MD, and Tina Payne Bryson, PhD , authors of Time-Outs Are Hurting Your Child wrote in an essay on Time.com.

Two key factors in effective discipline: communication and follow-up. “I don’t think punishment makes kids behave better because then they just end up resenting whoever punished them,” said one 12 year-old child. “But I think teaching kids how to act and explaining to them what is right and what is wrong will help them behave better.”

But how would kids discipline if they were a parent? The majority said they would put their child in time-out, followed closely by taking something away, like an iPad or TV privileges.

Indulgence

While 44 percent of kids do get an allowance (34 percent earn it through chores, while 10 percent simply receive money without having to do any work), 56 percent do not receive an allowance at all—and that’s a mistake, according to experts. They note that earning an allowance is an important way to teach kids about money management at a young age, such as having to save for what they want or compromising with mom and dad. “If it costs too much, they say that I can save up my allowance for half and they would pay half,” said a 10 year-old girl.

And when it comes to getting mom and dad to buy them what they want, kids ain’t too proud to beg, with 32 percent reporting that they will plead to try to convince their parents to let them buy or do something they want. “I tell them I would listen to them every second after that,” as one girl respondent put it. Alas, 44 percent of kids report that even after all of that begging, parents still say they have to earn it.

Competition

The debate over whether or not all kids should get a trophy for participating in an activity or sport is a hot button issue. Three-in-five kids think everyone deserves a trophy, but the older the kids get, the more they believe that only winners should get recognition. And while girls tend to favor recognizing everyone (66 percent), boys are more evenly split (53 percent everyone and 47 percent just the winners). “Kids have to learn that they can’t always win and they have to learn how to be polite when they lose,” said an 11 year-old boy.

He has a point: According to a study by The Ohio State University (February 2015), “parental overvaluation was the largest predictor of a child’s narcissism over time, but interestingly, it did not predict self-esteem. In other words, telling kids how exceptional they are doesn’t produce kids with healthy self-esteem—it just makes them more narcissistic,” according to a Forbes.com article.