I’m sure we can all agree that children have a knack for upsetting and unnerving us at times, yes? And yet there are nights, like this past Monday night, when my son and daughter both behaved with adult-like awesomeness exactly when we needed them to the most. How does this work?
Monday didn’t start so well, with some not-so-good-work news. But my wife and I rallied for our parent-teacher conferences at my daughter’s high school in the early evening. These are rushed meetings, with five minute limits, to allow the teachers to meet with as many parents who want to meet with them. The last time we did this we were inspired to have several serious chats with our daughter about learning, study habits, social media, performance, college, and the rest of it—and apparently, she got the message (how often is that going to happen?). A few teachers enthusiastically noted improvement in the areas they talked to us about previously. And, later, when we got to convey the news to Elena, who will soon be 15, it was such a pleasure to see her feel the praise, feel rewarded, feel like she can do this. So much so, that when we then pointed out a few areas that could still use more concerted focus from her, she listened without any defensive posturing.
In the time after the parent-teacher conferences and before meeting up later with Elena at home, we picked up our son Adam at a friend’s apartment and had dinner at a local Chinese restaurant. (Elena wasn’t available). Adam is now a fifth-grader, finishing up his years in grade school, and waiting to hear about middle school. And that’s not the only transition on his mind. For a boy who can be doggedly silly and obstructive, he surprised us by not only mentioning his new “health” class but by talking about it reflectively, pleasantly, seemingly proud of what he knows.
Turns out that Fart Man knows his fallopian tubes. Ditto for the uterus, the period, the sperm, really the whole reproductive process—which he spoke about without any recourse to goofiness. Get out of here! Who is this guy? I complimented him on his good company.
I suppose my children may have instinctively known that Monday would have been the wrong night to contribute to our cosmic pains. But we probably just lucked out. What we had, fortunately, were two beautiful reminders of why we go to work every day and try and be good people in the world and at home.
Eric Messinger is the editor of New York Family. He can be reached at [email protected].
