There are some things you can do to reduce everyday fighting. Here are some ideas from KidsHealth.org and other experts:
• Set ground rules for acceptable behavior, such as no cursing, no name-calling, no hitting, no yelling, or no door slamming. This teaches kids that they’re responsible for their own actions, regardless of the situation or how provoked they felt. It also discourages any attempts to negotiate regarding who was “right” or “wrong.”
• Be proactive in giving your kids one-on-one attention directed to their interests and needs. Don’t let kids make you think that everything always has to be “fair” and “equal” — sometimes one kid needs more than the other.
• Make sure kids have their own space and time to do their own thing, including the chance to play with friends without a sibling tagging along, or to enjoy activities without having to share 50-50.
• Have fun together as a family. Since parental attention is something many kids fight over, fun family activities can help reduce conflict.
• Recognize when kids just need time apart from each other and the family dynamics. Try arranging separate play dates or activities for each kid occasionally.
• Refrain from stepping in as much as possible. Instead, guide your children to resolve their own issues.
“Letting your children know you have faith in their decision-making skills empowers them to handle challenging situations,” Leiderman says.
• Take a look at how you resolve your own issues with your spouse, friends, and siblings, Leiderman says.
“Modeling good relationship skills and examining family dynamics are important steps towards creating a harmonious home environment.”
