My wife’s niece can rightly claim to be the mother of The Sweetest Boy On The Block. Our foursome visited with her foursome for brunch on Sunday at their apartment in Forest Hills. Not surprisingly, her little redheaded Eli, who will be four in March, was waiting for us by his third-floor window, just so he could shout out, “Hi Adam! Hi Elena! Hi Rebecca! Hi Eric!” and we could respond in kind, “HI ELI!”
The plot twist happened later in the day, when it seemed that Eli’s sweetness may have been a positive influence on my own boy, Adam, The Eight-Year-Old Insult Comic.
Whenever my wife’s side of our family has gathered for special occasions over the last two years, the child who has really stepped up as Eli’s main buddy has been my daughter Elena, now 12. Without any prodding from us, she started taking it upon herself to entertain and comfort Eli through much of their time together, as if she were practicing babysitting skills. Adam’s been much less interested in him. With prodding from my wife and I, Adam might offer Eli a half-hearted hug or a selfish suggestion that Eli join him to watch a football game. It was as if Adam really didn’t think he could have the kind of fun he likes to have, with Eli, or at least not at these ages.
But a new kind of Adam showed up at the Sunday brunch: He was the first child to start playing with Eli, and he engaged him for much of the day, showing lots of patience for activities he would never do himself. (“Hey Eli, how about we connect some more tracks for Thomas the Tank Engine?”)
Both my wife and I were quick and effusive in our praise of Adam’s behavior on Sunday.
“Nice job, Adam,” I said more than once.
So here’s my question: Did Eli’s friendliness win over Adam, or was he modeling behavior he learned from another source, his big sister? Maybe, in a way, he was even being a little competitive with her.
I’m keeping these thoughts to myself.
Eric Messinger is Editor of New York Family. He can be reached at emessinger@manhattanmedia.com
