
Before They’re Grown: One Parent’s Reminder to Slow Down and Be Present
We’ve all heard the reminder to enjoy parenting, because children grow up so fast. Never before had that simple saying proved to be more true than when I watched my son—my adorable, sweet, 6-foot-1, 14-year-old baby—acquire an insanely deep voice and trot off to high school. There are countless times a week when I just look at his face and my daughters, and see the beautiful, smiling toddlers they used to be, in what seems like just yesterday.
What haunts me sometimes is the thought that I have spent, no, wasted, so much time stressing over completely inconsequential things. I squandered days working too much instead of enjoying the day with my kids, worrying over things that never ever happened, and over-preparing for things I didn’t need to in the first place.
Psst… Struggling with Conflicting Feelings About Motherhood? A Peek Into Maternal Ambivalence
If I could go back, I would press the rewind button, slow down, and enjoy parenting so much more.
Make an Effort to Slow Down Daily
If you find yourself relating, follow these simple tips:
Slow down … literally! Stop trying to pack more into your day than you can reasonably handle. That pressure doesn’t just affect you—it spills over onto your kids. Constantly rushing creates stress, and stress creates chaos at home.
Repeat this small word: “No.” For such a tiny word, we sure have a hard time uttering it, and yet it can be the most freeing thing we do. By intentionally choosing not to overcommit, we are prioritizing enjoying our lives (and our kids!) more. We all know it, we just have to start doing it.
Do the same for your children. Give your children recreational activities, but don’t sign them up for so many obligations that they have no downtime after school and on weekends. Children need time to recharge and opportunities to do nothing. This is how creativity is cultivated. It’s also how children learn to restore themselves and become who they are.
Enjoy the little things. You know how you were rushing to get to school or work, but your toddler wanted to look at the beautiful flower in the neighbor’s yard or the ants gathering on the piece of candy on the ground? These seemingly insignificant things can become some of the most cherished moments. Humans were not made to live life at a frenetic pace. Ever notice how when you are at a beach or in a park, or somewhere else enjoying nature, your stress levels decrease? Our children are very good at this. Take their lead.
Make time for engaging in slow, simple, and meaningful activities together. Whether it’s drawing, reading a book, baking, or just sitting and talking, carve out space in your day to be with your child without distractions. Schedule art time or story time, and treat it like a sacred appointment—not something to squeeze in between chores or errands. Turn off your phone, close your laptop, and tune in completely. Don’t half-listen or multitask—kids notice when your mind is elsewhere. What they crave most is your undivided attention. Be fully present, fully engaged, and let those moments become the ones they remember most.
Don’t rush milestones. So what if your friend’s baby can speak in full sentences or is potty trained? Stop worrying about when or if your child will do certain things and just let him be. Every single human on earth is different, and we need to embrace this. Our child’s unique ways should be respected and celebrated.
Psst… Check Out The Ninth Inning of Parenting