As I write this, it’s the one month birthday of my twin girls, Asha and Nisha. It’s been a seriously awe-inspiring, comical, exhausting, and life-changing journey so far! In case you missed it, I wrote about my journey to deliver my identical twin girls naturally in the last two posts, “The Decision to go Natural” and “The True Story of a Natural Twin Birth.” I’m writing this series because I think more women should share their positive birth experiences to juxtapose against the often “scary” and “painful” portrayals of birth that have proliferated in media. This week, I want to share some of my most positive feelings and experiences as a brand-new mom. I am not going to tell you about the negatives because I think we’ve all heard plenty of stories about how hard motherhood can be!
I’ve been doing a ton of thinking about the magic of bringing life onto this Earth. My husband, Sachin, and I are fairly spiritual people and we believe in reincarnation. We feel that these two beautiful souls have chosen us as parents and manifested into the physical form of Asha and Nisha. They have come to us totally unexpectedly…in fact, I found out I was pregnant on my honeymoon in the early part of 2016. We both run AHAlife.com, an all-encompassing and full-time global marketplace for independent designers and artisans (our third baby), and definitely didn’t have twin girls on the road-map. However, they chose us and they chose the timing, and for that we are truly blessed.
As a woman, I’ve experienced a total transformation, a new sense of confidence and newfound love for the “goddess” within me. I didn’t really experience this through the actual pregnancy itself, but now that I’m postpartum, I feel that I’ve really come into my own in a way I never imagined. It feels as though parts of me have been “unlocked” and I am getting to know a whole new woman–one whom I really love! Our bodies are truly miraculous; I am still in awe and am humbled by the fact that I helped create and carry these two beautiful, kicking, and thriving girls to term. Now, they are growing pound by pound from my body’s breast milk (getting a lactation consultant was key for me post-birth). I feel honored, blessed, and grateful for what the universe has provided for me and my family. The other part that’s been really surprising to me is my natural ability to be a “mother.” Prior to birth, I doubted myself, read too many books and articles, and was feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all. I was never one of those women who dreamed about being a mother. However, since my twins have arrived, I’ve listened to my instincts and have truly found a natural flow with my girls. Not everything is perfect, but my husband and I have found that love, attention-to-detail, patience, and a ton of humor have been key to helping us get through many sleepless nights!
Our girls have also helped us slow down and be more present. When I hold them, I enter into an almost meditative state. I often find myself consciously soaking in the moment and an overwhelming sense of calmness takes over me. I used to suffer from anxiety, often over trivial things. These issues seem to have subsided since their birth. The girls are also already teaching me things. There are moments when I stare into their eyes and feel that we are telepathically communicating. Instinctively, they know I am their mother and are often instantly comforted as soon as I hold them against my chest. Symbiotically, as I comfort them, I also experience pure feelings of peace and elated joy.
Finally, I’ve gotten to witness a whole new side to my husband, Sachin. The gentle, deeply caring and innocent love that he shows to our girls and to me has expanded my love for him. It’s been a wonderful experience for our relationship, helping us gain a greater appreciation for each other. I can truly say I am looking forward to growing old with this guy. It’s only been a month and we have so much to learn and experience, but I am very pleasantly surprised by how positive and less stressful this experience has been so far, with him by my side. In hindsight, I should’ve entered this experience with a lot more excitement and less fear. We are so excited to continue to get to know our girls and foster a loving and open environment for their souls. Thank you for reading and sharing in my birth story and experience–now I have to put Asha and Nisha to bed!
Shauna Mei is an MIT engineer turned commerce and media industry expert and the founder and CEO of AHAlife.com (a global e-commerce marketplace powering over 4,000+ designers and artisans from 45+ countries). Mei’s mission is to create a global community that supports independent brands on a content meets commerce platform featuring quality objects for every aspect of life.